Child Murders,Murders, and wicked people

I'm going to start this one Krystal, but it's late and this one is hard to do. That is a long way of saying this will be edited, lol.

May God forgive me but I just can't look past anybody that murders or rapes a child. Plain murder is hard enough and yet one can get past that. I think of all I have had trouble doing, finding forgiveness for someone that murdered a family member is the hardest thing I have ever done. Having said that, it is the best thing I ever did as well. When we hate or not forgive, or at least myself anyway, it feeds the negative forces on earth. Satan is quite alive and well and just because we don't believe in him, it doesn't save us from him, if nothing else, it makes us more vulnerable.

My great grandmother use to fuss at me for hardening my heart. She kept telling me to stop hating this person. I told her my hate kept me warm at night. Her last week alive was a request not to kill the person who murdered a family member by going after him. Honoring that request was one of the hardest things I would ever do, with the exception of forgiving. Don't get me wrong, I do believe in capitol punishment in crimes where cold blooded murder is involved. I do believe that a person should defend themselves to whatever means that needs to be done.

My daughters have often said I wasn't afraid of anything or anybody, but they are wrong. I tell them never to fear anything or anybody, for all they can do is kill the body and after that, they can do no more. There is one though to fear and that is one that can kill the soul. That person I fear. The thing is though is that we have that power and they cannot have that power over us unless we give it to them. We have that control and nobody can take that from us unless we allow it to be taken.

I've been asked many times if I thought asking for forgiveness in my final moments was what saved me, and I think that is part of what saved me. The other part was forgiving the person that murdered my kin. Oh what a weight was lifted. I had carried more than I ever should have carried because I chose to, and the weight was more than I could have imagined. It was like swimming across a body of water with concrete boots then suddenly they shattered. Now would I ever set and eat with this person...NO. But I will ask God to forgive him and have and do and ask that he lead a better life.

I went to church some time back, something I really need to do more often. Across the hallway sat one of the meanest guys I had ever known growing up. We were mortal enemies. This guy had no morals, no heart, and I would have swore no soul either all the years I had known him. People feared him, even those who were family. Having been able to forgive the one guy, seeing this person made the hairs on my arms stand up. Suddenly the preacher said for everybody to stand up and shake hands. I shook the people's hands in the part I was setting in as when I turned around there he stood, hand outstretched, smiling. I was prepared for more of an arm wrestling event, yet in his eyes were light and smiles. His grip was firm but not by any means threatening. He spoke a soft yet masculine voice, ... God, I figured the next word out of his mouth would be damn followed by you, but instead he said God bless you. Welcome. I at least hope he did not see my jaw drop. I freaked out. I asked around about him and come to find out he also volunteered for missionary work, be it here or wherever. That is when I saw just how far I still needed to come, and still I always find more I'm lacking.

I have no idea what event changed him but I do know that whatever event God had that changed him also changed me. I then knew for sure that I had a lot to work on inside me instead of trying to fix someone else. Not through his words but through his actions I was changed. I still stand in amazement of that day, and in shame too. For I had not seen or given even credit to what God can do and to the good in all people. I don't think there is or has ever been anybody that has no good what-so-ever, living or dead somewhere inside them.

People are wicked I think when they can be opened to evil. Some call it demons and some evil spirits. From what I have studied so far, when the body or mind is compromised is when we leave a door open. That can come through stress, sickness, drugs, alcohol, bad actions, or anger. I think that is why you see so many people these days that get lost. I prayed hardest while I was doing the treatments with all the pain killers in me. I was terrified that I was wide open. Now this will sound like a nut but also TV. I watch some shows and movies but very little. To explain how that works it is easier and shorter to pass the buck. Google Hollywood Unmasked. I don't remember if they go into the electronics part of it but ask me and I'll tell you how that works.

Doors many years ago were arched and some today are still built that way. Most are fascinated by the architecture and think it is only for show, but a study of history shows that isn't the case. Demons or whatever term makes one more comfortable were thought to hang onto doorways waiting to drop into a compromised soul. By arching these doorways it was thought that demons couldn't hold onto the doorway and wait. Older people, many probably didn't know why though, we taught to not stand in a doorway. You move through it but never just stand in it. Now maybe this is legend, old wives tales, or maybe it isn't... I'm not the one to say. What gives it some credence is watch to see just how many people stand in a doorway, even when in a store building, and stop and talk. Now notice how crazy people seem these days. Employers seem to think that some stress is a good thing, I know I heard that for many years at UPS.

As for wicked people, I avoid them as best as one can, but that isn't always the case. When I come across one in person, I just ignore them. If they are rude or speak rude, as long as it is to me then I just talk nice. I gotta a guy now that has a smart alecked thing to say to me almost everyday I see him in the same place, and when he don't, he makes fun of my rough voice I have these days. He laughs, I laugh. I even help him sometimes make fun of the way I sound now since this throat cancer. This has been going on for months now. At first a few people laughed, then fewer people laughed, now none. He is even slacking off. We actually sat and ate a time or two. Could I take him physically, probably. Could my weird sense of humor turn it on him, definitely. I can be pretty smart alecked myself sometimes and those who know me know I can pop 'em right back out, but what would be the point?

Thing is, I refuse to lower myself to their standards. Someone cuts me off in line. That's ok, I'm next. Someone jumps in front then looks back and asks if I was in line. I say yes, but go ahead, I'm in no hurry. As long as they are doing it to me, they have got it made. Now if it is someone else, different story. The closer I am to that person the worse I will put it back at them. It's funny but one would be surprised at just how they affect another, good or bad. Thing is. Life is just too short and precious to let someone bring you to their level. Like when you listen to a radio or watch TV, turn the channel. The most powerful people are the ones who don't use their power in a negative way unless all else demands they do, and they set the bar for that high. I like to say I'm disappointing them.

I really don't want to comment on child murders. I have this thing about kids and old or sick people. My comments wouldn't be very nice though as to someone harming or murdering them. If the death was an accident, one thing. Murder intentionally or rape, I have little compassion for them. I think they can get forgiveness though. I think even Hitler could get forgiveness if he repented in his heart and asked.

Romans 12:19
Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.

Mark 9:37
Whosoever shall receive one of such children in my name, receiveth me: and whosoever shall receive me, receiveth not me, but him that sent me.

But when Jesus saw it, he was much displeased, and said unto them, Suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God.